The Sexiest Part of a Woman  Chapter 4a of 4 
Chapter 4

At work I was useless.  I was worse than useless.  I was grumping around
and really had nothing to do so I was making everybody lives miserable. 
Finally a good friend of mine, Joe, said "What's buggin' you man.  If
you were a woman I'd accuse you of PMS!  Jesus you're a grump today! 
What's up?"

"Oh I don't know.  Yes I do!  I had a fight with Tina last night."

"Tina McDaniels?  I didn't think you were seeing her any more.  Are you
back together?"

"No, Yes, I don't know."

"Hmmm, I think you may need a little therapy tonight.  Want to tie a few
on at the 'Station'?"  The Station was a local watering hole where we
both spent more money and time than we should have.

"No, I think I'll just go home."

"Shit man you're too depressed to be by yourself.  I think I'll crash
your pad and bring some relief with me.  Ok if I bring a change of
clothes in case you get too morbid?"

"Huh, yeah sure.  Whatever."  I picked up my stuff and left.

As I was driving home I was thinking I should have been nicer to Joe. 
Joe was a great guy and always willing to help out in a pinch.  He's the
guy who hired me.  He was about 30 years old, had a great job, super
sense of humor and didn't have a mean bone in his body.  He was also a
great dancer.  I was always envious when we went out to clubs.  He had
the girls lining up for dancing and always wondered how often he scored
because of it.  He never kissed and told.  It was usually the next
morning hangover that gave him away.

Oh well.  I'll take a swim in my pool, cool off, and I'll be able to
stop dwelling on Tina.

I got home around 3:30 and had just jumped into the pool when I heard
Maria holler around the fence.  "You're home early again?  You're not
going to lose your job are you?" 

I looked up expecting a new outfit but was surprised when I saw she had
jeans and a grubby shirt on.

"I thought you'd wear something new today."

"Oh I did!  I took it off so I could do some of your work.  I didn't
want to ruin it.  I guess I won't be doing the pool today."

"Oh sorry.  I'll leave it free tomorrow, is that ok?"

"Sure, I'll take Sammy for a walk."

"So how was your day with your new clothes?"

Maria came running over to the pool and said "You wouldn't believe it! 
I was really nervous but met Connie on the way so she could support me. 
I walked up to her and I had to say something before Connie knew it was
even me!  She screamed and jumped up and down saying she couldn't
believe it.  She told me how pretty I was and how the 'bitches' would be
so jealous.  I didn't want the bitches jealous." she said and then
lustily "I wanted the boys 'interested'." she finished with a devilish
smile.

"Wow, that's great!"

"Wait!  I haven't gotten to the best part!  Connie and I walked to
school and when we went across the school yard all these people turned
to stare at us.  I went to my first class and everyone went quiet when I
walked in and sat down.  I heard all these whispers but pretended I
didn't.  I was so nervous I couldn't say anything anyway!  Then Mr.
Reams, the first period teacher came into class.  When he saw me he
started to say that the seat belonged to another student when he
realized it was me.  He then said, are you ready for this? He said, 'Oh
hi Maria.  You look very nice today.'" Maria was jumping up and down
excitedly!  I thought she was going to pee her pants.

I was about to say something but Maria had just stopped to take a breath
and was off again. "That happened all day long and you know what
happened at lunch?" I tried to say no but couldn't even get this out
before Maria continued "Connie came running up to me in the lunch line
and asked me 'Do you know Jose Martinez?' and I replied that I thought
so but hadn't really spoken to him.  I thought he was one of the weirdos
in school who kept getting beat up by the bullies.  Connie told me that
Jose had seen us walk in in the morning and then saw me in the hallways
and wondered if I was a new girl in school!" 

"I saw him later in the day and remembered who he was.  He's the kid who
did well in the math class but everyone was always picking on.  I
remember feeling sorry for him one day when he was just walking do the
hallway and one of the seniors just jumped out when he wasn't looking
and just knocked him completely off his feet.  He didn't even know what
hit him.  Everyone in the hallway was laughing." 

"I decided maybe he could help me with my math homework so I went up to
him to ask.  I NEVER do that!  I wouldn't dare talk to a boy until
today! So I walked toward him and when he saw me he hesitated and then
he smiled at me.  I think I was already smiling at him.  Anyway, I
introduced myself and said that I was struggling in math and would he be
willing to help me after school.  He said yes!  Do you believe it?"

"Wow Maria that is amazing progress in one day!  Do you think Jose has a
superman brain like me?" I asked smiling.

"Well, he's not as handsome as you but you may be right about the smile
being sexy on a boy too.  He had a very nice smile." I saw that she was
thinking about that smile and it was reflected in her face.  I felt very
happy for her and then had an overwhelming sense of melancholy as I
remembered Sally, the friend who saved me and then I lost.  I tried very
hard to keep it to myself but had to dunk under to hide my tears.

I regained control and came to the surface.  I apologized to Maria
saying I needed to cool off - her story was making me too excited.  She
laughed and said "Me too!"

She was about to go get Sammy when she turned and sheepishly asked
"Jack?"

"Yes, Maria?"

"Umm, if I, uh, we, I mean, if I use up those two condoms can I get more
from you?" she was really blushing.

I roared "Of course Maria!  You can have as many as you can use!"  Maria
was really embarrassed then and whispered thanks and walked away with a
big grin on her face.

Maria's interest in the condoms got me out of my funk and I was swimming
laps for a while when Maria came back from walking Sammy.  Maria was out
of breath but still smiling.  She gave Sammy a good petting and a cookie
reward and then came bounding out to the pool.

"Jack, can I show you what I wore to school today?"

"Oh yes please.  I want to see it."

"Ok, don't go away!  I'll be right back." she ran off to her house and
ran up the steps three at a time.  I never saw her with so much energy.

A little while later I heard her come out of her house and she called
around the fence "Are you ready?"

"Yes, shall we have a drum roll?"

She jumped around the fence and said "Ta Da!" and did a pirouette.  The
effect was as dramatic as yesterday's outfit. This was a full dress, not
a blouse and a skirt so was a bit more conservative than yesterday's
combination. I suspected she was nervous on this first day and probably
wore the most conservative outfit.  I also suspect that she would wear
something more dramatic on Monday.

I whistled as she turned.  She was absolutely beaming.  The colors were
conservative but complimented Maria's coloring perfectly.  Tina was a
marvel!  My heart sank when I thought of Tina but I recovered when Maria
said "Do you like it?" 

"Yes, Maria.  I like it very much. You look very beautiful in it." She
did too.  The dress did not hide the fact that she was 'full bodied' but
it did accentuate Maria's curves and seemed to actually amplify them in
just the right places and made Maria look quite voluptuous in a very
understated way.  God, the tricks these women can play!  She came to the
edge of the pool and showed me all sides of the dress.  The dress made
her so appealing I had to restrain myself from taking advantage of the
view I had up her dress from my vantage point.  My god, I thought to
myself.  It is no wonder the fashion industry is such big business -
their product has such betwitching power on us mortal men.

She finally stopped turning and said sheepishly "I was hoping for a
lesson last night.  You guys went inside though."

"Um, yeah, sorry Maria.  Tina and I sort of hit the hay early last
night."

"Will Tina be coming over tonight or this weekend?" Maria said hopefully
and then added "I don't mean so I can spy on you, although I probably
would..." she admitted. "I would just like to see her and say hello and
thank her again."  My heart panged.  "I'd also like to tell her about my
day - maybe some of the stuff I wouldn't tell you.  You know, girl
talk." She winked at me.

"I don't think so Maria.  I think Tina had something going on this
weekend.  We may not see her for a while." I choked on the words.

"Oh, that's too bad.  Could you tell her I said hi when you talk to
her?"

"Um, yes Maria I will."

Maria turned to leave and ran right into Joe as he was coming in the
fence.  Joe grabbed Maria to keep her from falling and they both
apologized to each other.  I laughed despite myself and yelled over
"Since you both know each other intimately now I should introduce you. 
Joe, this lovely young lady is Maria Gonzales.  Maria, this is Joe
Turner.  Don't believe a thing he says and keep your eyes on his hands
at all times."

Maria laughed and put out her hand and said "I don't think he's painting
a very good picture of you."

Joe, rather than shaking Maria's hand took a very deep bow, kissed
Maria's hand, and said "Nonsense, my dear, you should believe everything
he says.  He is certainly right about you." he finished with his award
winning smile.  I would not be surprised if Maria wet her pants on the
spot.  She sort of took in her breath and backed out the gate, bumping
into the door, and then slowly walked backward toward her house.

Joe came over and said "Cute kid."

"Yes she is Joe.  I hope you brought lots of relief with you!  I'm going
to tell you a story."

Joe sighed knowing it was going to be a long night and he was probably
glad he had brought a change of clothes.

I was pretty much drunk when I finished telling Joe about Maria and
Tina.  When I was telling him about Tina and how she left I was crying. 
Joe knew about Sally so could understand the emotional toll this week
had taken.  He finally shook his head and said "Jack, Tina was right. 
You are a nice guy.  From what you've told me you've done a miracle with
Maria - she looked very pretty.  I wouldn't have believed anyone would
have called her a fat pig this week if you hadn't told me the story."

"But it wasn't me!  It was Tina who picked out the dresses!  She did the
miracle!  And now I've lost her!" silly sod crying again.

"Jack, you may be a nice guy but you're also a dumbshit.  For a smart
guy you really are stupid.  Tina wouldn't have been here or bothered to
shop for dresses or spent time with Maria if it hadn't been for you. 
Maria wouldn't have bothered changing from her stupid way of dressing if
you hadn't been a friend and got her out of her rut.  Jesus man!  I hate
to see you so morbid when you've got everything!"

"Joe!  I've lost Tina!  I've got nothing." more fucking sobbing!

"Like I said - dumbshit.  I'll make a bet with you.  I say you haven't
lost Tina and I'll buy the first case of Champagne for your wedding if
I'm wrong."

"Wedding?  What the fuck are you talking about?  Don't you understand? 
Tina's left me!  I had her in a flash and knew she was the one and then
she's gone!  Why am I so fucking stupid?" I sobbed and then said
"Besides, there wouldn't be a wedding if you lose."

"See, you're not so stupid after all!" Joe said laughing at me. "Come
on, let me get you to bed."

The next day I slept late.  I finally got up when I heard the back door
slide shut.  I went out and saw Maria getting Sammy ready for a walk.  I
had to quickly pull my bathrobe closed to cover up my naked body.

Maria laughed and said "Geez Jack, you look like shit."

"Thanks Maria.  I'm glad I have you as a friend.  I'm not sure what
you'd say if we weren't friends."

Maria laughed loudly and I had to shush her because my head hurt.  "Have
you seen Joe?"

"Yeah, he's out by the pool.  He doesn't look as bad as you."

"Oh, that's only because he's younger than me." I quipped.  Maria roared
again but then mouthed "sorry" when I grabbed my head.

I saw Joe had made coffee.  I grabbed a cup and went outside.  I was
immediately sorry I did.  The sun was blinding and hurt my eyes all the
way to the back of my skull.  I limped over to Joe and was really pissed
that he didn't look bad at all and he had a shit-eating grin on his
face.

He shouted out "How ya doing buddy!"

"Christ Joe you are the meanest friend a guy could have. and thanks for
listening to my whining last night.  I heard on the news that I made a
complete fool of myself."

"As usual the news got it wrong.  You already were a fool - you made a
complete ass of yourself last night."  I laughed despite the pain.  How
could I stay mad at a lunk like Joe?

"So what do I do now Joe?"

"Well you could try aspirin or tylenol."

"No you stupid shit!  I mean about Tina?" I was desparate again.

"I think you call her and ask her to come over or go out on a date and
don't take no for an answer."

"Do you think she'd see me again?"

"Well I like Tina and I know she's not a fool.  She'd have to be a fool
not to want to latch up with you.  Therefor, quod erat demonstrandum,
q.e.d., I'm trying to figure the best date for your wedding."

I sank in a chair and drank my coffee.  I wish I had Joe's optimism.

That afternoon, after Joe had left, I called Tina but only got her
answering machine.  I left a message for her to call me and just sat in
the backyard waiting for the call that never came.  In the afternoon I
watched Maria clean the pool.  I was amazed at her energy level.  She
kept talking about seeing Jose on Monday.  I was trying to figure out
what to do about dinner when I realized I had won a bet with Maria.

"Hey Maria!"

"What Jack? Am I doing something wrong?"

"No, you're doing a great job.  No, I just realized that I won the bet
you made.  You need to pay up."

Maria's look of concern changed to fear and she said "Um, there must be
something else we can bet."

"Nope, that's what you bet.  You need to pay up!  Please arrange to have
your mother join us for dinner tonight or tomorrow.  Let me know what
time works for you guys."

"Um, ok, I'll ask later."

"No, go ask now before she makes other plans.  The pool can wait."

Maria was really concerned but reluctantly let go of the pool vacuum and
went home to talk to her mother.  Or so I thought.  I waited for a while
but Maria didn't come back.  I finally decided to go over to the house
and knocked on the door. 

Theressa came to the door "What do you want?" she asked sharply.

"Well, I had invited you and Maria over for dinner but I hadn't heard
anything back so I was wondering what time you wanted dinner?"

"Dinner?  I don't know anything about dinner and we're already busy for
dinner." she went in the house and closed the door.  I heard the
deadbolt snap closed.  Geez.  I didn't know if Maria had asked and
Theressa pretended she hadn't or Maria was too scared of her mother to
ask.  In either case I came to the conclusion I was eating alone.

I went back to my place and tried Tina again.  Answering machine.  Damn!

The next day was morbidly quiet.  No Joe, no Maria, no Tina.  Even
Theressa would have been a welcome change.  I was no longer hung over
but I felt like shit.  Christ.  Last week my life was perfect and now -
Now I didn't even know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.

I went to work on Monday but my colleagues continued to bitch about my
grumpiness.  Joe finally stopped by and asked if I had heard from Tina. 
I said no.  Joe simply said "Keep trying."  I called for the fifth time
and left another message.

I finally went home and moped around the pool.  I heard Maria's door
open and heard Maria call around the fence "Do you want to see today's
outfit?"

I was down but didn't want Maria to know so I said "Sure!  Let me have
it!"

She came around the corner and I actually gasped.  God she looked good! 
I don't mean that she looked ok in a nice dress.  I mean She looked
fucking good!  I couldn't help myself and said "Holy Shit!"

Maria laughed and said "I guess you like it?"

"Umm, Maria, I'm just glad we worked out our understanding about older
men being a hazard because you're definitely 'unsafe' now!"

Maria thought that was really funny. "Jose liked it too."

"Christ Maria, he'd have to be dead not to like it!" I realized that
might be insulting to her friend so said "Sorry, I shouldn't have said
that.  Please forgive me."

"It's ok Jack."

"So tell me about Jose!  Did you guys get together today? To, er, study
math."

"Yes Jack." she sounded embarrassed now and then said "and we 'did'
study math smarty pants."

"Oh yeah?  So he didn't try to kiss you?"

"Welllll, YES! He did kiss me - I mean try to, oh what the hell!  Yes he
kissed me and I kissed him back.  We spent a lot of time talking about
how the some of the school kids were really mean but when I told him it
didn't matter to me any more he asked why.  I just told him that they
weren't worth worrying about.  We should spend time with the friends who
care about us rather than worrying about the mean people."

"Wow, what a great message.  And what did he say?"

Maria looked at me strangely and said "He said 'what a great message'
just like you said it.  That's amazing."

"Sounds like the superman brains are in agreement.  On a couple of
matters."

Maria blushed.

"Do you like him Maria?"

"Yes I do." she said without hesitation. "At first I was drawn to him
just because he was interested in me and I thought that he would
understand my situation because people pick on him too.  But then, the
more we talked, the more we talked about stuff we liked and how we feel.
And you know what?"

"What?" Maria was excited and I really wanted to hear why.

"He asked me about what I liked and I thought maybe I should make
something up, something more interesting than what I like, but then
thought, no, I should be completely honest with him and told him exactly
what I liked and that he may think it's boring but I had to be honest
with him. And then he smiled.  Jack, when he smiled because I told him I
wanted to be honest with him my heart felt like it was melting.  My
stomach felt really weird.  That's when I kissed him."

God I felt so happy for Maria!  It made me feel worse about Tina but I
was really happy about Maria.

"Are you going to see him again?"

"Yes, he's going to help me with math all week.  I think I'm really
going to improve."  I smirked.

Maria looked insulted and said "No really Jack, we really do study and
talk about math."

"And?"

Maria blushed and said "Well, yeah, and other stuff too.  But we do
study math." not letting go.

The next two days were similar.  I didn't hear from Tina, Joe kept
telling me to be patient, Maria was happier than I had ever expected. 
On Thursday, when I saw Maria she was wearing a different combination
than I had seen before but I had seen the pieces in other combinations. 
Tina had done a good job teaching Maria how to combine things to get
more mileage from her clothing.  Shit!  Tina still wasn't around.  I was
thinking I needed to go beat down her door.

Anyway Maria was really excited when I got home.  I barely got in the
door.  Maria had been waiting for me in my kitchen, Sammy was with her. 
I told her how nice she looked but it seemed like she wasn't interested
in that.  She had something more important to talk about.

"What's up Maria?"

"Well, I'm kind of embarrassed to ask."

continued in Chapter 4b