Sucker 13

I looked at her silently.  And I waited.  I understood her.  But to
nod might signify assent, and I didn't want to seem to be approving
what I feared was coming.

She understood that and went on slowly, clearly, carefully.  "Those
fuckfest movies explained why I couldn't get excited about you
physically.  Because physically, you weren't exciting!  Oh, all
right, I guess, but not for what I need!"

I said nothing.  I brushed my curls off my face with my fingertips,
just a quick little gesture, silly and girlish I realized.  And
pouted thoughtfully.  And waited.

"You'd show me those films almost every time we went to bed.  First
those enormous dongs on those guys, pushing those girls' thighs so
far apart they seemed to be giving birth in reverse,  That vision
was then followed by your reality, your own little weenie poking
into me.  So inconsequential I couldn't make it seem larger even in
fantasy!"

A stray thought struck me, thank God I'm now a woman like her, not
a man, or this story would be devastating me!  I can sympathize
with her!  My own wife found my manhood inadequate?  Then surely
she'd have left me, sooner or later.  If I hadn't ... changed.  If
she hadn't tricked me into changing.  If I hadn't come over!

She went on.  "Well, sweetheart, it had to happen, didn't it!  One
day a few years ago one of our account executives asked me to join
him for lunch, tete-a-tete.  I remembered that a typist had told
the rest of us that he was especially impressive.  No, that's not
right.  What she really said was -- let's see if I still remember
her exact words -- 'Girls, he's a major heavyweight where it
counts, that stud!  I don't know how he can walk with what's
hanging down there.  Or how he can lift it.  It's a good thing it
comes up by itself, and that once it's up it stays up for hours and
hours!  He used that thing on me one afternoon and I couldn't walk
for two days!'  That's what she said.  I remember her words,
because she said them with such a deeply satisfied smirk on her
face.  And because as I found out, she wasn't exaggerating."  

She looked directly at me.  She seemed to be studying my slightest
change of expression.  I made sure there was none.  I looked
directly back at her.  She smiled slightly, satisfied that I was
not going to go crazy over this confession.

"Well, I knew about your occasional women, so you set me the good 
example there too.  I didn't blame you, honey, not then nor now.  
And this account executive was handsome enough, too, really buff! 
He wasn't loveable, like you, but he had his ways!  We had lunch, 
and then neither of us returned to work that afternoon.  I almost 
didn't return here that evening, the sex was so great.  A revelation!
An eye-opener.  And not only my eyes were opened!  I could scarcely
walk, he stretched me out so!  God, he was hung like a horse!  He
fucked my pussy, my tits, my ass, over and over!"  She paused,
still studying my face, then she went on.  "My mouth!  I blew him
of course!  I was crazy about that love-stick by the time we got
around to mouths!  I sucked that cock all the way down my throat! 
When he came, I didn't taste any of it, I just felt my neck
palpitate.  But when he pulled out, I got a trace of spunk on my
tongue, and it was soooo good!  It's an acquired taste, as you now
know, and I acquired it right then and there!  From then on I had
to have it.  You understand.  But not yours, because then you'd
wonder why I'd suddenly gone ape over eating jism, wouldn't you?  
And what if yours wasn't as tasty?  I didn't want to have to 
play act with you, ever!  And of course I might not have gone ape 
over you.  You're really so very small compared with what I need, 
honey!"

She waited.  After a while I swallowed.  Then I nodded.

"Understand me this way.  I really know what I'm saying about that
man being hung like a horse.  A year later I'd had so many big men
inside me I decided to try a horse, on a whim.  A pony, anyhow.  I 
was stretched enough by then to take him into me and feel real good 
about it.  I sprawled high up on a pile of saddles, and he really 
did give my pussy the pounding of its life!  I tried big dogs too.  
Lots of speed and drive -- your cunt can go crazy when a great 
Dane is vibrating his thing inside you.  But then they take so long
to disengage, and there's nothing to do but just lie there with them
waiting for their knot to go down.  And there's no afterplay, and
they can't go again soon afterward the way real men can.  Some men. 
Men are much better partners if they're well-equipped.  You can
hold on and steer them where you want them, and set up your
own rhythms for them.  I've used dogs to lick me out, they're great 
for that.  But you're better!"  

Then out it came.  "Samantha, I maintain a whole stable of well-hung
men now, my regulars, maybe a half-dozen all over town at any one
time, really big men willing to drop everything and come whenever
I call them.  The office, here, a nearby motel, a car in a parking
lot, anywhere!  I call them pretty often.  Some weeks I never do
seem able to get enough."

I tried to swallow, but this time I couldn't!

"I guess I'm a sexual person"  She smiled sweetly.  What could I
say?  "And I bet you're wondering why I bother with you at all, a
woman with my appetites and you for a husband!"

Why didn't I feel more humiliated?  Why did she seem to be talking
about someone else?

"Because I love you!  The problem has been, how to keep you!  
Especially when you eventually found out about my taste in other 
men.  Or other women.  As Bruce told you, I like girls too.  I 
make love to girls as often as I fuck men.  Marcie, my secretary 
Maria, other girls at the office, other girls elsewhere altogether.
You don't know most of them.  But girls have a special feeling 
together that men don't know about and can't share.  I feel so 
much more intimate with them!  We feel very close, me and some 
of my girlfriends.  I can really feel intensely passionate about a 
girl, if she strikes me as just the right kind of girl."

I nodded slowly, reluctantly.  God, would it never end?

"While you were away on your sales trip a few weeks ago, I missed
you.  More than I've ever missed any of my studs, or any of my
girlfriends.  I wanted you the worst way!  Not your body, of
course.  You!  Just to be with you!"

I nodded.  Were tears coming into my eyes again?  What kind this
time?

"And then it struck me!  Like a thunderbolt!  A blinding
revelation!  I was dumbfounded!  I couldn't get any work done all
that day, just turning it over and over and thinking through the
implications!  Absolutely marvelous!  You know what my idea was?"

I shook my head.  I hoped that didn't violate my code of silence.

"That you would make just the right kind of girl!"

I was utterly addled!  She saw that I had drawn a blank.

"Maybe you didn't hear me, lover!  Let me say it again.  I can get
intensely passionate when a girl strikes me as the right kind of girl!"  

I began to understand now where she was going.  Tendrils of curly
hair on the back of my neck began to stand on end, or so it seemed. 
My crimson mouth opened in astonishment, and my darkened, fringed
eyes opened even wider.

"You're the right kind now, darling!  As my partner in life you're 
without peer or parallel, you're my dearest love!  My only love!  
And now that you're a girl?  Really and truly a girl -- you proved 
that with Bruce, repeatedly!  Now that you're my sweet, feminine
darling?  You're perfect!  Oh, come kiss me right now, my lovely
sweetheart!"

I don't know why I should, I was thinking.  Given everything she'd
just confessed!  Debbie'd betrayed me!  She'd ridiculed me, at
least my physique!  She'd deceived me!  For years she'd been a
nympho with big cocks but frigid with mine!  I was jealous!  Wasn't
I?

I stood up, and straightened my dress.  She was holding her arms
wide open to me!  I didn't know how I'd respond, and it took me a
moment to balance on my dress heels.  

But then I moved forward and into those arms.  She folded them so
tenderly around me.  Still wordless, I kissed her.  Some of my
fresh lipstick remained on her upper lip, so I tried to kiss it
away.  I nibbled on her lip, then some more!  She kissed me back
passionately, and closed on me, held me tight for the rest of her
little speech -- I couldn't have gotten away if I had wanted to. 
But I didn't want to.  She whispered the rest of it to me
devotedly, adoringly, her eyes wide open and smiling into mine, our
faces almost touching.

"As a man you do nothing for me, Sam.  Oh, I've tried.  But as you
know only too well now, there's nothing!  Before we were married I
hoped I'd feel different afterward, and afterward I hoped my
feelings would change.  But there's nothing.  There's never been
anything.  Neither attraction nor revulsion.  Indifference, I'm
afraid.  It isn't your fault.  That's how I feel about most other
men too."  

She paused.  Her arms never eased.

"All but two kinds.  One is the kind I've collected in my stable,
men hung like horses.  Studs with phenomenal endowments, huge
pricks, strong backs, stamina!  I can really get off with one
of them over me or under me making me happy.  Even just by thinking 
about it.  Some of them are bigger than Bruce!  Can you imagine?"

My face was just in front of hers, and she gave me a peck on the
lips and then another, holding each kiss until I kissed her back.  I
realized that with every returned kiss I was sinking irretrievably
into approval of everything she was talking about.  Her
infidelities, her sexual appetites, her betrayals.  Her rejection
of me as a man.  But I couldn't help it!  And she knew it.  She
kept staring into my eyes to remain aware of my every reaction,
touching her lips to mine all through everything she then said,
prolonging contact until I returned her ardor kiss for kiss.  And
despite everything, we both began to grow warm.  I reached for one
of her breasts, and held it, and caressed her nipple between my
thumb and forefinger.  She sighed and melted a little.  "You'll
love yours too, I'm sure," she added. "I know you do already!" 

Then she continued, "The other kind of man that turns me on is one
I can control, ... manipulate into doing something that demeans him
in his own eyes.  Something humiliating.  Psychologically castrating.
Physically too!  I love that feeling, the domination, the power.  
I've feminized several men already.  My own boss is now a woman!  
Pussy and all!  Men in bed with her and all!  And so much happier!"

I couldn't say anything.  I nodded.

"And now, look at you, sweetheart!  While you were away a month
ago, I realized that if I could turn you into a girl with a certain
feeling for men, with a feeling like mine, I could get very
passionate about you.  We could have the happiest marriage
imaginable, souls and bodies joined in a perfect union!"  

And she kissed me lovingly again, as if she had conferred on me an
enormous compliment.  She had!  And I kissed her back the same way,
now accepting her compliment!  She seemed to smile her confession
at me now.  We were girl to girl, as if we were sharing a piece of
dishy gossip about something she'd done to some other man somewhere
else, someone who needed and deserved it.  We were two bisexual
women chatting in an amusedly superior way about a presumptuous and
inadequate former guy named Sam!  

"But I knew you'd never agree on your own!  Never!  Men's egos are
so fragile, they're so afraid to seem effeminate.  So I decided to
begin with that tape about cock sucking, to see if I could talk you
into sucking someone's cock.  There's nothing more humiliating for
a man, I'm sure!  When I'm ready to dump one of my men, I'll often
seduce him into servicing one of my newer men.  For the old one
it's a kiss off, just as you'd feared when you left Vita's.  For
the new one it's a test of his obedience to me, to see if he'll let
a man blow him if tell him to.  The old lover I never see again. 
I tell him I can't think of him as a man now that I know he sucks
cock, goodbye.   And it's true, I can't, sweetheart.  When you
agreed to suck Bruce's cock, way back, that's when you became less
than a man in my eyes!  But it didn't matter because by then you
were on your way toward becoming more than a man!  To becoming a
girl!  Because that was my plan!  Because I still love you!"  

"Anyhow, my new lover gets rewarded for letting another man suck
him off, in ways he never forgets, I make sure of that.  And then
for a while he's my favorite.  

"Bruce has been making moves on me for months, and one of his
former girlfriends assured me he's the kind of man I like, so I
decided to test him.  Now he'll be my favorite for a while!  He 
came through this past weekend very satisfactorily.  He allowed
the man I'm dumping to suck his cock!  And he was willing to give 
my new girlfriend her first loving fuck."  She looked pleased with
herself.  Then she went on.

"Do you understand now why I felt so blissful, so delighted, so
passionate the morning you agreed to become my darling cock sucker? 
Because it meant we could stay together!  Because it meant you were
on your way, you'd soon become my kind of girl!  I had to make love
to you then!  I wanted to!  I had to reward you for agreeing to do
it.  But I also had to assure you and your fragile ego that it
wouldn't matter, that you'd still be a man in my eyes despite your
honoring my little request.  Not true at all, but forgivable.  I
was overjoyed!  Goodbye to my boring husband Sam, whom I could
never again respect as a man.  A man who services other men's
penises?  And an impassioned welcome to my gorgeous, beautiful,
lovely, glorious girlfriend, my sweet Samantha!"  

I realized I actually looked grateful to her when I heard her say
that!  There were tears in my eyes!  I resented the deception, but
my feelings were altogether at odds with my thoughts!

She knew my thoughts and my feelings!  "I didn't want to deceive you 
about my sex life any longer.  I wanted you to be my lover, my
devoted, soft, beautiful, adoring and adored girlfriend and lover! 
My most intimate and beloved lover!  You could never be that as a man!  
But that's what you are now!  My passionate Samantha, free to love me 
and be loved by me but also free to satisfy men or be satisfied by 
them in any way she takes it into her pretty little head.  My men or 
her own!  Other women too!  My complete love!"

With that Debbie stared deep into my eyes as if confirming to
herself that I was indeed now what she had hoped.  Satisfied, she
closed her own eyes in rapt concentration. She wriggled her chest
against mine, and the movement disengaged my hand from her breast. 

"Time enough for that later, my love," she whispered.  "Soon.  Soon
your little thing will stop rising altogether, and your nipples
will complete their growth, and you'll find they more than
substitute for your penis as erectile erogenous centers.  Two for
one!  Another few weeks of milkshakes and they'll reach full
plumpness.  Then we can caress each other and suckle each other to
our heart's content.  And men can too if you wish!  They'll want to!
Soon!"

Her hand reached to stroke my hip, then to caress it, then to raise
the hem of my dress until it found the elastic at the top of my
panties.  It squirreled its way underneath and took complete
possession of my prick, her hand wrapped tightly around it as it
plumped up.  A little.  Her other hand, I realized, had also
reached under my dress and also had hold of my panties, and was now
pulling them down.  I returned one more lingering kiss,
passionately.  I was completely hers! 

And she whispered to me in an intense hiss, "Already this thing
doesn't really harden any more!  Soon  you won't care.  Soon you'll
want Sandra to give you something nicer down there for us to play
with.  For your men and your women to play with.  But now, while it 
still matters to you, while you're still a little bit responsive, 
I want to keep my promise.  Whenever you want it, while you still 
want it, Samantha, just ask me!" 

Debbie sank down in front of me, pulling my panties down as she
went.  When she was on her knees and her beautiful head was just at
the level of my crotch, she inclined the whole of my slack penis 
into her mouth and pulled on it with her lips.  That was what I 
had once wanted.  Her tongue licked it.  It felt warm and wet, 
wonderful!  That was all I had once wanted.  But now?  Slowly, 
deliberately, with artful dexterity, her eyes calmly gazing into mine,
Debbie gave me the first and last blow job of the rest of my life.