Training Carrie
                                   Chapter 18

    I woke up to someone knocking on the bedroom door. I panicked for an
instant, I couldn't move my body. Carrie was lying on top of me. I gently
rolled her off, grabbed the gun off the night stand, and went to the door.
I stood to one side of the door and asked who was there. "It's Philip, Sir.
Are you and ... the Slave all right, Sir?" Holding the gun behind me, I
unlocked the door and opened it a crack. I saw Philip's concerned face, and
swung the door open. He was alone. I could breathe again. I looked back at
Carrie, she was sitting up in the middle of the bed wearing a smile of
relief.

    I turned back to the bed, trying to hide the gun from Philip. I told
him to come in, we had a few things to tell him. He said, "You're not going
to shoot me, are you, Sir?"

    I raised my hands in the air, and said, "No, Philip. we weren't sure it
was you. Please come in, I'm putting the gun away."

    Carrie said, "It's Ok, Philip. everything is Ok." I asked Carrie to
please tell Philip what we were doing with this particular gun, why it was
in here with us, where she slept at night until I came here, the survival
kit, our hike yesterday, the circumstances of our return to the house, and
anything else she could think to add, while I sat quietly on the bed and
calmed down a little. I set the gun on the table with last night's dishes
and went back back to the bed. She told him the whole story, starting with
her night terrors, my decision to make her a participant in her defense,
etc., etc., ending with our nervous return in the dark, and our continued
fear even though we knew the house was empty.

    When she finished, Philip sat quietly for a minute. Then he told her he
was very sorry that he withheld information from her. She said she knew he
did it out of love and concern, and she was sorry she tried to hide her
fear. She said she had also tried to hide it from her Master, but her
Master wouldn't allow that. She reached out for me, and I took her hand.
Philip said he believed that we had done everything just right, except when
we both went to sleep. "No shit, Philip," Carrie said, and we all three
laughed. Then Philip congratulated me for thinking of the survival kit, and
said it was a sure cure for Carrie's feeling of helplessness.

    I asked Philip where I could take Carrie for some target practice. He
said he had a sort of shooting range in the basement of his house, that we
were welcome to use at any time. He said that Beverly wouldn't stand for a
visit that didn't include some social time, and she would try to tell
Carrie she shouldn't play with guns, but that he would talk to Beverly and
clear the path for another visit from Bill and Carrie that included half
social and half shooting time. I said, "How about Wednesday afternoon?"
Philip said he would make it happen.

    It seemed like everything had been talked out, so Carrie asked,
"Philip, would you please make some breakfast for us, lots of fruit, some
yogurt, whatever, except nothing that has even seen a frying pan? I'm going
to change my Master's breakfast habits before he kills us both. And Philip,
we're sorry about the mess in the kitchen".

    As he was leaving, Philip got in a shot. "Carrie, I've seen worse when
you were here alone."

    I had Carrie examine the gun and determine for herself that it was
safe. Then she put it in the plastic bag, and put that in her kit and
zipped up the bag. I took her hand and led her to the bathroom. We both
used the toilet and bidet, and then toweled each other dry. We both also
washed our faces. I combed out her hair, and asked her if she wanted it
brushed. She said she thought it looked Ok as is.

    We went back to the bedroom, and I got her blouse and high heels and
dressed her. I said I guessed she was happy she wouldn't have to wear her
"reverse apron" for awhile. She said it was Ok, it kept her naked as her
Master wanted her to be, but still let her act human. She didn't mind
wearing it. I kissed her and thanked her, and she acted like she didn't
know what I was going on about. I laughed and held out my hand. She took
it, and we went to breakfast. When we got to the dining room, Philip hadn't
put out our breakfast yet. I seated Carrie, then said I would go get us
some coffee.

    I walked into the kitchen and asked Philip if there was any coffee. He
said there was, and started getting it. I told him that was Ok, I would get
it myself. While I was doing that, I told him that when I told Carrie
"everything," I managed to leave out the part where I might wind up in
prison. I said that knowing that would not help Carrie, and I didn't want
her to hear about it unless it was actually about to happen, and then I
would tell her. He agreed that she shouldn't know about that unless it
became necessary.

    I returned to Carrie with the coffee. She asked how long it would be
until breakfast was ready. I told her Philip was on it, he would bring it
out as soon as he could. We held hands and sipped our coffee. I saw her
looking at me, and asked her what was wrong. She said she had fucked her
Master, and she had fucked Bill, who was that guy who made love to her last
night? I said sometimes with her, I was an idealistic kid who's just met
his true love. That kid had sex for the first time last night. She asked if
the kid would ever make love to her again, and I said if she wanted that,
she could count on it happening. She said that, like Bill, it was not the
essence of our relationship, but it sure would be a nice change sometimes.
I said that I agreed, that there was no reason why each of us couldn't play
a wide range of parts in the other's life.

    Just then, Philip showed up with breakfast. It didn't really look like
my kind of breakfast, but I decided to give it a try. If I couldn't eat
anything else, at least there was toast and jelly. In fact, it was all
tasty. When we had eaten, I said I would admit I liked it, but how would I
get my daily quota of grease. She said Philip could bring me a tablespoon
of lard, if I really wanted it. I decided to pass.

    As we were finishing our last cup of coffee, she asked what was on the
agenda today. I told her that in about a half hour she would do her
elliptical trainer aerobics, and I was looking forward to listening to her
talk for 35 minutes. She corrected me, and said that today's duration
should be 40 minutes. I smiled and said she was right.

    She asked what we would do after that, and I said I had no idea, we
would just wing it.

    About 35 minutes later, I took her into the training room, wearing her
slave bonds and with her wrists joined behind her back. I set her survival
kit down just inside the door. She started to walk over to the elliptical
trainer, but I took her arm and said, "let's go over here first." I steered
her over to where the crop was lying on the floor, where I had dropped it
when I first found her in this room nearly a week ago. I asked her if she
remembered when that crop was put there, and she replied formally that she
did remember. I asked her if she missed being trained under the crop. She
paused, and said she didn't know how to answer her Master's question, it
was a very complicated issue and couldn't be answered Yes or No. I said
that was fair enough, and asked her if she thought she could answer the
question by talking about it while she worked out. She smiled at me, and
said she was certain she could answer like that. I told her I was looking
forward to her answer, and took her to the trainer.

    I attached the leash to her collar, unfastened her wrists, and told her
to put on her socks and shoes. Then I had her get on the trainer for her 5
minute warmup. She started immediately, and I attached the leash to the
back of the trainer and went to get a glass of water. I watched her from
the Master's area as I drank half a glass. then I carried the glass with me
back to Carrie. I told her when her 5 minutes were up, and she dismounted.
Before she could start her stretches, I put the glass up to her lips and
asked her if she would like a sip. She looked into my eyes as I gave her a
sip, then she smiled and started her stretches. I hoped she had noted the
contrast between my behavior today and my stupid, cruel treatment of her
the last time we were here.

    When she finished her stretches, she climbed back on the trainer and
began her hard workout. I went around in front of the trainer and sat on
the floor with my back against the wall. I smiled at her, and she began
talking to me. She started right away answering my question. She said that
she looked at the question as having two parts. The first part was, did she
enjoy feeling physical pain inflicted on her by her Master? Her short
answer to that had to be Yes, because she had a drive to be submissive to
her Master, and that meant that anything her Master did to dominate her
brought pleasure, and forcing her to receive pain was a form of domination.
Also, she still had issues over feelings that she needed to suffer to atone
for real or imagined transgressions or failings. She said she thought she
had worked through the errors in thinking that had led to those feelings,
but she couldn't be sure she was free of them.

    She went on to say that, having said she had a sort of drive to accept
pain because it was a form of domination, and that she might still think
she deserved pain as a form of punishment, the longer answer was No. There
were a variety of ways her Master could dominate her, that satisfied her
submissive needs, but that didn't harm her body. She said that, under the
domination of a cruel master, she would fear that eventually her body would
show the wear and tear from constant physical abuse, and then her master
would not want her any more because of the results of the damage the master
himself had caused. She said while that sort of treatment was the master's
right, and the slave's lot if it had such a master, that was a stupid way
to use a slave.

    The other facet of the Master's question was, is fear an effective
training technique? When she was first put in the training room and the
master started giving her commands, she wanted very badly to obey every
command perfectly. She was terrified because she had no idea what to expect
during her training, or what would be done to her while she was locked in
this room for months, subject to the whims of this one man. She said when
he first started testing her, she knew that no matter how well she
performed he would find reasons to punish, humiliate, and berate her. And
that proved to be the case immediately. She said her treatment, though she
had expected it, increased her terror a great deal, and made her less able
to respond adequately to the next command or question, and produced more
punishment and more terror. But she knew her only hope was to continue
trying her very best to be perfect. And soon she began to think and hope
that it was paying off, her punishments were occurring less frequently, her
master seemed more satisfied with her performance. But the thing is, she
tried as hard as she could the whole time. A little patience with one who
was totally inexperienced at the start would have produced the same result,
in the same time. Only a slave who was put in the room against its will,
and who was fighting against the master's dominance, would really benefit
from the punishment. But then, why would a slave be put in the room against
its will in the first place. Didn't all of the trainees want to be trained,
as she was told they did?

    Finally, she said, after all of that rambling, her answer was that she
fondly remembers her time in the organization's training room, because that
time led her to her true Master and the love of her life, and there was no
doubt that during that time she was being subjected to training under the
crop. But she will never forget that the same Master, when reunited with
her here, immediately discarded the crop and cruelty as methods of training
his Slave. She would love him forever, and his ability to forge a
partnership of love with his Slave, and train the Slave with love instead
of cruelty, is something she is in awe of and eternally grateful for.

    She said she knew she had rambled all over the map in trying to answer
the question, and hoped her answer contained the information the Master
wanted when he asked his Slave the question. she asked if she should
continue trying to provide answers to her Master's question, of go on to
other subjects. I said "go on." She spent the rest of her time talking
about last night. She said that when she first woke up she was terrified,
but when she saw that her Master was handling the situation, her fear
diminished and she knew he would do his best to protect her. She talked
about our tender love making and how it had touched her heart. She thought
she knew her Master's personality pretty well, but then she discovered that
she might have just begun to understand him. The more she learned, the more
she was reassured that this was the man she belonged with for the rest of
her life. She went on for awhile, speaking directly to me instead of about
me, telling me what it meant to her that we were in each other's life. She
was still talking to me when her time was up. I really hated to stop her,
but I didn't want her to overwork herself, so I called time.

    She immediately slacked off to her cool down speed. I almost told her
to continue talking, but I didn't. What she was telling me would be better
said in bed tonight, and I would give her a chance to say it if she still
wanted to. I watched her until her time was up, and called time again. She
immediately dismounted and did her stretches perfectly.

    I detached her leash from the machine. I told her she was on informal
speech until we were ready to leave, and told her we should lap the room a
few times to continue her cool down. As we were walking, she said, "Well,
what was my answer, Master?"

    "You don't want me to use pain to discipline you unless I have to, and
you don't think I'll ever have to." I looked at her face, and she was
smiling at me.

    When we got down to the end of the room, where the punishment area was
located, she asked, "Master, will you ever put me in here and whip me?"

    "Not if I can possibly avoid it. But I have the will to do it if you
ever force me to. I beg you to never do that, it would kill me to use a
whip on you again."

    "I won't, Master, I promise." Now it was my turn to smile. I told her
that the crop would always remain on the floor where I dropped it, as a
sign of the pact between us, that physical pain would not be necessary, and
would not be used, to obtain the Slave's obedience to the Master's will.
She asked if we could seal that pact with a kiss, and there, in her
training room, with her naked, in bonds, and wearing a leash, we shared a
tender, loving kiss.

    "That settles the issue of the crop, and also more severe devices, such
as whips and belts. But your Master can't help but wonder if you would have
a slightly different answer where the flog is concerned, and if the issue
was stimulation before sex rather than training discipline."

    She swallowed hard, and answered slowly, "Master would be right about
that. This Slave is deeply conflicted about the flogging. Frankly, Master,
it scares me that I like it so much."

    "First, Slave, let's be precise about the subject matter. You have only
been flogged on your ass and the back of your thighs, and the inside of
your thighs. We have never explored flogging your breasts or your stomach,
belly, and the front of your thighs. Give me your reaction to all of
those."

    "Master, I think I would enjoy occasionally being put on the rails and
having my ass and the backs of my thighs flogged before being butt fucked,
although Master flogged me too hard the last time we did that. Having my
breasts flogged scares me, perhaps we could try it once to see how bad it
is. I would submit to flogging my stomach, belly, and the front of my
thighs any time Master wishes." She realized how she was wording her
answers, and corrected herself. "Master, your Slave didn't mean to say that
the choice was the Slave's in any of these matters. Of course, it is the
Master's right to do what he wishes to his property at any time. Your Slave
was trying to express its feelings, not telling its Master what to do."

    I kissed her on the forehead, and said, "Relax, Carrie, I asked your
feelings on these issues, and you were correctly responding with
information. Of course the decisions rest with the Master, but the Slave's
preferences will always be a consideration. But you haven't addressed the
flogging of the inside of your thighs."

    She looked down, and didn't say anything for perhaps a minute. I waited
her out. Finally she looked at me with tears in her eyes. "Master, I loved
being strapped into position on that stage, like I was on display. And I
enjoyed the flogging, at first. But it was too hard, and it went on too
long, it hurt all day long, Master. The thought of having to submit to that
every day was perhaps the most terrifying part of my initial training. And
it was so arbitrary, Master, it wasn't for sex, and it wasn't for
punishment, it was just torture."

    "And if it was for sex, and if it was no harder than the Slave's usual
ass flogging, and if it was occasional rather than daily?"

    She gave a barely perceptible smile, and said, "Then it might be
pleasant, Master."

    "Are we in agreement, then, that the occasional floggings will
continue, over the areas of the Slave's body we have discussed? And that if
the Slave finds it unpleasant or terrifying to have her breasts flogged,
after she has experienced it once, we will rule out that area in the
future?"

    "Yes, Master, that sounds like a plan."

    "Let's finish your cool down walk, Carrie." We finished our round trip,
and then made the circuit one more time. I told her to remove her shoes and
socks, then attached her wrists behind her back and removed the leash. I
asked her if she needed to use the toilet, and she said no. I asked her if
she wanted some water, and she said Yes. We walked down to the toilet area,
and she took 4 discharges of water. When she was again standing, I looked
at her, smiled, and said "Bedtime." she looked puzzled at first, then
grinned. We walked back to her bed.

    I installed her in her bed, put the ass support under her, then lowered
the bed until her butt was resting on the cushions. I took the nipple clips
out of my pocket and attached them so that the shaft of each clip was
pointing at the opposite breast, as opposed to the usual orientation of
pointing toward her feet. With her breasts strapped into the bed, the
nipples were not that far apart, and the ends of the two nipple clips were
only about an inch away from one another. I went rummaging around in the
drawers in the Master's area, and finally found a large spring loaded paper
clip. Maybe she had thought in a weak moment this would make a good torture
device, or maybe she liked paper clips. I returned to her and used the
paper clip to attach the two nipple clips together. I looked at her face,
and she obviously had no idea what was going on. I kissed her, and said
"All will be revealed." She smiled.

    I went and got the small clip-on vibrator and the two penis shaped
vibrators we had used before. I attached the clip-on vibrator to the paper
clip, and turned it on. She gasped. I looked at her face, and said, "The
Slave will not come until given permission by her Master. Understood?" She
said she understood. I pushed one of the dildoes into her pussy, and the
other one I greased up and carefully inserted into her ass. I turned them
both on and then went around to her head and warned her that she must hold
both of these in her body until they are removed by her Master. "No
squeezing." She echoed my command. I watched her for a while, and she was
obviously experiencing a lot of pleasure. She didn't seem to be having any
difficulty. I kissed her and told her I loved her, and she said that she
loved me, too.

    I walked over to the bars and picked up the light flog. I walked back
and showed it to her. Her eyes got big. "I'm going to flog the insides of
your thighs now, Carrie. Each time the flog contacts you, I want you to
give me the count, and then ask me to please do it again. Do you
understand?"

    She swallowed, and said, "You want me to keep count of the number of
times I am flogged, and each time I am to give you the count and ask for
another. Is that correct, Master?"

    "Yes, Carrie, that is correct. And you are to avoid any orgasms until
given permission, and you are not to allow either of the vibrators to
escape from your body. Is all of that clear?" She said it was clear. I
said, "I know I am asking a lot of you, Carrie, but I would not ask it if I
didn't think you could do it. You're my beautiful, perfect Slave, and I
love you."

    I walked back to her crotch, and lovingly kissed the inside of her
thighs for a minute, until I thought I had given her good coverage. I
stepped back and struck her left thigh.

    "One. Please, Master, may I have another?" After a pause, I struck her
right thigh.

    "Two. Please, Master, may I have another?" After 50, I told her we were
not finished, but we were going to pause for a minute. I carried the flog
and walked around to her head. There were tears flowing down her face and
into her ears. I took out a handkerchief and wiped her cheeks and ears. I
asked her how she was doing. "Is your Slave's performance acceptable to the
Master?" she asked.

    "Much more than acceptable, Carrie. We are almost finished with this,"
dragging the flog across her breasts, "hold on just a little longer. Do you
remember the count?"

    "Fifty, Master." I walked back to the other end and struck her left
thigh.

    "Fifty-one. Please, Master, may I have another?" Her thighs were taking
on that rosy glow I was looking for, and I decided to stop at 80. She
stayed with me until the end, and I told her the flogging was complete. She
said, "Thank you Master. ... Master, would you please lay the flog on the
Slave's breasts, as a promise of future flogging? If the master chooses, of
course."

    I went back around to her head again, laid the flog across the upper
half of her breasts, so she could see it, and told her I was very proud of
her. I smiled at her and gave her a long, tender kiss, which she returned.
I told her she was now going to give me a long, slow blow job, and that
when I came she would also come. I lowered her headrest to the best
position, and put the head of my cock up to her lips. She couldn't move her
head, she was limited to whatever movement she could make with her lips.
She kissed the head of my cock and then tried to draw it into her mouth. I
pushed it forward to accommodate her.

    She went to work with her tongue and lips. Since she was immobilized, I
had to provide the in and out motion. I tried to get in sync with her
activity, and after a few seconds we were cooperating very well. I asked
her if she could swallow me for a few seconds, and she said something that
sounded more like Yes than No. When I saw her take a deep breath, I pushed
forward. I saw her throat pulsing as she swallowed, and felt the tightness
of her throat around my cock. She wasn't struggling, so I assumed she was
Ok. For about 20 seconds I made short strokes in her throat, and then
pulled back out. She opened her mouth as far as she could and gasped around
my cock for a few seconds to catch her breath, but her tongue never stopped
working. Then she closed her lips around me again and continued. Soon I
felt the orgasm starting, and I said "Give me a long orgasm, Carrie, NOW."
I knew she would explode, and I felt there was some risk, having my cock in
her mouth during that time. But I decided to trust her to avoid biting me.
So I kept stroking, and she kept working with her lips and tongue, while
the rest of her body was convulsing.

    I discharged into her mouth, and she swallowed everything I gave her.
After I stopped moving, she began tenderly cleaning me off. She was still
convulsing from the orgasm. I shook my head in wonder of her capabilities.

    I pulled out, readjusted her headrest and walked around until I was
looking down at her face. Her body had stopped convulsing, and she asked me
to please turn off the vibrators. I turned off the one driving her nipples,
then went around and turned off the other two. I removed them and wiped her
down. Then I went back to her front end and removed the clip-on and the
nipple clips. I looked at her face again, and she looked exhausted, but she
was smiling at me. She asked me to please free her hands so she could hold
her Master. I quickly did as she asked, then I stood beside her, leaning
over her and kissing her breasts. She was doing the best she could to hug
me with her arms and hands. She kept telling me over and over that she
loved me.

    After a minute, I started extracting her from the bed. When she was
standing up again, she looked at the ass support I had kluged and said,
"Thanks again, diet soda."

    I led her to the Master's area and had her sit on the couch. She
hesitated, and I told her not to worry that she was naked, just sit down.
Master's rules, Master can break them. I got her a glass of cold water, and
she drank it all. I gave her a blanket to put over her, and I sat down next
to her and took her hand. She looked at me and asked if she had performed
to her Master's satisfaction. I slid around on the couch until I was facing
her, smiled and said, "How could you ask me that, Carrie? You were perfect,
you did everything I asked of you to perfection. Could you have done
anything better?" she said she always wanted to be perfect for her Master,
but never thought she came very close to her goal. I told her it was a good
thing we had decided that I wouldn't use punishment with her, because both
of us beating up on her all the time wouldn't be fair. She laughed and
asked if that's really what it looked like to her Master. I said that I
might have exaggerated a little, but that it wouldn't hurt her self image
if she could accept, just a little, what a magnificent woman and a
magnificent person she was. I told her that one side of her brain knew that
she could do anything she wanted to do, why was that other side constantly
denying her capabilities? She said she didn't know, but she agreed with her
Master that there was something like that going on. She said she would try
to figure it out, and that our talks would eventually help her sort out all
of these issues.

    I laid her down on the couch and then squeezed on beside her. She
immediately pulled herself up on top of me, covered both of us with the
blanket, and pulled a pillow under my head. "Just shut up for now, Master,"
she said, and started kissing me.

    I lay still and accepted her attentions for quite awhile, then it
became apparent to both of us that I was hard again. "An unanticipated side
effect. ... Well, not entirely unanticipated," she said with a grin. We had
a long, slow, tender fuck on the couch, during which she came numerous
times. Once was enough for me.